Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Monday, January 17, 2011
Sorry! It has been awhile...
Well, where do I begin. It has sure been a long time since my last blog. Too long if you ask me. Most people know what has been going on since then but for those who do not. I will give a real quick run down.
Lets see, the school year ended with the kids all passing and moving on to the next grade. Thankfully.
In June, Tyler went to his fathers house in Texas for the summer. I sure do miss him when he goes but he needs to be apart of that family too. He did get to place baseball for a few games before he left. He sure is a talented little boy. He can take to any sport. Amazes me everyday how great he is.
July we went to Minnesota to visit Grams and Kourtney. Then after Tay's softball season ended we headed down to Texas for our annual vacation. We picked up Tyler, visited with my mother, and sister Emily. Spent a few days in Schulenburg hanging out poolside with my little brother James and his wife Veronica. Of course the best part of that was getting to see Cristain and little Maddie Cakes ( my niece and nephew). They are great kids. It was so nice to have my children playing with other family member. It does not happen a lot.
Then we headed to Rockport for some time at the beach. Hot but fun. We went fishing, and watch the dolphins swim. Pretty neat if you ask me. Then Tyler had to go back to his father for a few more weeks. Oh yeah, before we went to Texas we did go through Arkansas with Brad's parents. Destination, was Diamond State Park. Goal was to dig for diamonds. Between the 120 heat index, nobody but me dug. Taytum and Tanner went and lasted about 5 minutes. It was hot and dirty. Of course I did not find any diamonds. Recommend never doing that again.
On the way back home we stopped in Dallas to visit with Pops then made the long trip back to Kansas City. Brad got really ill while driving and we had to stop overnight because of it.
August, we picked up Tyler. Grams came down the weekend before school started. I found out that I was expecting a baby and me and Brad were super excited. We were going to keep it a secret for a little while but with my big mouth and Grams being in town. I just had to tell her. Everyone, was happy. Even the kids. Which kind of shock me. Tanner was the most excited. Immediately talking about his baby sister. He even started acting like a big boy and going potty in the potty. Just like that he decide to do it and has not had an accident since. I am so proud of him. The first day of school went great. Kids liked their teacher and I was happy to have some quiet in the house. Brad was still having attacks of his gallbladder and finally the doctor decide it need to be removed.
September came and things downhill for us. Brad had his surgery and was home on a medical leave for awhile. He went back to work and found out he was going to lose his job. I had a prenatal check up. Tanner and Brad went with me. Tanner was so excited to hear "his baby sister heartbeat". Got to the appointment and the doctor could not find the heartbeat, but said it was still early. So she sent me to sono. There is where we were told that I had a missed miscarriage. The baby stop developing at 8 weeks. I thought I was 10 weeks. I was devastated. We all were. It was one of the most heartbreaking moments of my life. A week later I had to have D and C. The day before I go in Brad loses his job. Talk about things just going from bad to worse. That began the whirlwind of packing boxes and decide what we absolutely needed and what could go into storage. We could not afford rent on the house anymore so we move into Grams and Pops house. Put most of our stuff in storage and just took what we needed. I kept the kids in the same school and sports. I don't want things to be anymore harder on them than it has to be. A lot has happen to our little family that stability is best. At least what I can give them. Thanksgiving and Christmas came and went. Still no job. Not for a lack of trying. Trust me both me and him have been applying everywhere. I fear the money will run out. I know that we have lots of people who wont let us fail but it is still scary. Brad is even opened his job hunt to other states. At this point we have to do what we have to do. I still get sad and angry when people speak of babies. We tried for so long and I was so happy. I love all my kids but I have never just said "I am gonna have baby cause I want to". Between all the other things that I had to deal with after the miscarriage, I never really let myself come to terms with it all. I put on a brave face for the kids and Brad. I deal with the more important issues at the time but sometimes I feel like punching someone in the face or screaming as loud as I can. The new year hopefully will bring some good to our family. Maybe a nice job for Brad. Get back on our feet and makes some financial progress. Maybe try again on the baby when things improve. I don't know, but I have really high hopes for 2011. I do hope to blog more often for all of you. Till next time.....
Lets see, the school year ended with the kids all passing and moving on to the next grade. Thankfully.
In June, Tyler went to his fathers house in Texas for the summer. I sure do miss him when he goes but he needs to be apart of that family too. He did get to place baseball for a few games before he left. He sure is a talented little boy. He can take to any sport. Amazes me everyday how great he is.
July we went to Minnesota to visit Grams and Kourtney. Then after Tay's softball season ended we headed down to Texas for our annual vacation. We picked up Tyler, visited with my mother, and sister Emily. Spent a few days in Schulenburg hanging out poolside with my little brother James and his wife Veronica. Of course the best part of that was getting to see Cristain and little Maddie Cakes ( my niece and nephew). They are great kids. It was so nice to have my children playing with other family member. It does not happen a lot.
Then we headed to Rockport for some time at the beach. Hot but fun. We went fishing, and watch the dolphins swim. Pretty neat if you ask me. Then Tyler had to go back to his father for a few more weeks. Oh yeah, before we went to Texas we did go through Arkansas with Brad's parents. Destination, was Diamond State Park. Goal was to dig for diamonds. Between the 120 heat index, nobody but me dug. Taytum and Tanner went and lasted about 5 minutes. It was hot and dirty. Of course I did not find any diamonds. Recommend never doing that again.
On the way back home we stopped in Dallas to visit with Pops then made the long trip back to Kansas City. Brad got really ill while driving and we had to stop overnight because of it.
August, we picked up Tyler. Grams came down the weekend before school started. I found out that I was expecting a baby and me and Brad were super excited. We were going to keep it a secret for a little while but with my big mouth and Grams being in town. I just had to tell her. Everyone, was happy. Even the kids. Which kind of shock me. Tanner was the most excited. Immediately talking about his baby sister. He even started acting like a big boy and going potty in the potty. Just like that he decide to do it and has not had an accident since. I am so proud of him. The first day of school went great. Kids liked their teacher and I was happy to have some quiet in the house. Brad was still having attacks of his gallbladder and finally the doctor decide it need to be removed.
September came and things downhill for us. Brad had his surgery and was home on a medical leave for awhile. He went back to work and found out he was going to lose his job. I had a prenatal check up. Tanner and Brad went with me. Tanner was so excited to hear "his baby sister heartbeat". Got to the appointment and the doctor could not find the heartbeat, but said it was still early. So she sent me to sono. There is where we were told that I had a missed miscarriage. The baby stop developing at 8 weeks. I thought I was 10 weeks. I was devastated. We all were. It was one of the most heartbreaking moments of my life. A week later I had to have D and C. The day before I go in Brad loses his job. Talk about things just going from bad to worse. That began the whirlwind of packing boxes and decide what we absolutely needed and what could go into storage. We could not afford rent on the house anymore so we move into Grams and Pops house. Put most of our stuff in storage and just took what we needed. I kept the kids in the same school and sports. I don't want things to be anymore harder on them than it has to be. A lot has happen to our little family that stability is best. At least what I can give them. Thanksgiving and Christmas came and went. Still no job. Not for a lack of trying. Trust me both me and him have been applying everywhere. I fear the money will run out. I know that we have lots of people who wont let us fail but it is still scary. Brad is even opened his job hunt to other states. At this point we have to do what we have to do. I still get sad and angry when people speak of babies. We tried for so long and I was so happy. I love all my kids but I have never just said "I am gonna have baby cause I want to". Between all the other things that I had to deal with after the miscarriage, I never really let myself come to terms with it all. I put on a brave face for the kids and Brad. I deal with the more important issues at the time but sometimes I feel like punching someone in the face or screaming as loud as I can. The new year hopefully will bring some good to our family. Maybe a nice job for Brad. Get back on our feet and makes some financial progress. Maybe try again on the baby when things improve. I don't know, but I have really high hopes for 2011. I do hope to blog more often for all of you. Till next time.....
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Thoughts of you...
This last week has been hectic. We had Grams and Pops in town for the weekend. Taytum had a basketball tournament and the everyday ins and outs. My house is a mess, and I feel like I spend a lot more time in my car then I am use too. Which keeps breaking down on me in the school parking lot. Thank you to the guy who helped me out.
All of this seems absolutly meaningless since I heard about Layla Grace Marsh. I have been following this babies story for over a week now. I have looked at her pictures and cryed. I have celebrated the fact that she pooped and kept down juice. All this for a child I have never met. A child who has Stage 4 Neuroblastoma. This little 2 year old is dying. Her parents have been by her side for weeks. Not expected to make it passed 2 weeks she is now on 3. I read the story and it broke my heart. I wanted to go and hold her. I want the lord to take her pain away. I want to know how someone so little and innocent can suffer so much pain. I want her family to know that I pray for her to be healed. I want to ask God to show me miracles can happen. That he alone is able to heal. Layla has made me realize that life is short and precious. That it can be gone in a second. Right now is all we really have. I hold my children a little tighter and longer. I dont sweat the small stuff so much. As long as I think about Layla and how her mother wishes for her to be at her feet again making laundary and unloading the dishwasher a harder task then it should be. I pray for the streghth for the family and her parents. I can not imagine how hard it is to sit and watch you child die and not be able to do anything about it. Just try their best to keep her comfortable. I am amazed at the journey Layla has had and how in her photos she still smiles so brightly. She is an angel on earth sent here to remind us to Love. I am so blessed to have healthy children. I know that now. If you want to follow Layla's journey you can at LaylaGrace.org. It will tear at your heart strings. It will make you cry. It will remind you to love your family and prayer really makes a difference. I know that God will not heal her the way we want. But over 40 thousand people have been praying as hard as they can for her. Which may have been the Lord master plan for Layla. So tonight before you go to bed pray for Layla and her family. Pray for all the sick kids in the world. Hold you children tight. Tell them you love them and spend as much time with them as possible. Layla Grace thank you for being a messenger of God.
All of this seems absolutly meaningless since I heard about Layla Grace Marsh. I have been following this babies story for over a week now. I have looked at her pictures and cryed. I have celebrated the fact that she pooped and kept down juice. All this for a child I have never met. A child who has Stage 4 Neuroblastoma. This little 2 year old is dying. Her parents have been by her side for weeks. Not expected to make it passed 2 weeks she is now on 3. I read the story and it broke my heart. I wanted to go and hold her. I want the lord to take her pain away. I want to know how someone so little and innocent can suffer so much pain. I want her family to know that I pray for her to be healed. I want to ask God to show me miracles can happen. That he alone is able to heal. Layla has made me realize that life is short and precious. That it can be gone in a second. Right now is all we really have. I hold my children a little tighter and longer. I dont sweat the small stuff so much. As long as I think about Layla and how her mother wishes for her to be at her feet again making laundary and unloading the dishwasher a harder task then it should be. I pray for the streghth for the family and her parents. I can not imagine how hard it is to sit and watch you child die and not be able to do anything about it. Just try their best to keep her comfortable. I am amazed at the journey Layla has had and how in her photos she still smiles so brightly. She is an angel on earth sent here to remind us to Love. I am so blessed to have healthy children. I know that now. If you want to follow Layla's journey you can at LaylaGrace.org. It will tear at your heart strings. It will make you cry. It will remind you to love your family and prayer really makes a difference. I know that God will not heal her the way we want. But over 40 thousand people have been praying as hard as they can for her. Which may have been the Lord master plan for Layla. So tonight before you go to bed pray for Layla and her family. Pray for all the sick kids in the world. Hold you children tight. Tell them you love them and spend as much time with them as possible. Layla Grace thank you for being a messenger of God.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
This weeks has been a hectic one and its only Wendsday.
Well where do I begin. This week has already been an adventure. First off, I smell gas in the basement. Been smelling it for a long time. Brad said I was crazy it was just musty. Anyways, I call the gas company on Sunday and they sent someone out. He was rude but helpful. There was gas leaking from the hotwater heater. I knew I was not going crazy!!! So guess what now I have to deal with the landlord and tell her. She is russian and does not understand English very well. She get her maintence man to come out and tell me that he will replace it Monday. So here I am with no hot water and some stinky kids that need a bath before school on Monday. So its off to TIppys house. Baths done and home to watch the Grammys. Monday morning arrives and I have to take my brother to a job interview at Walmart. He then has to go do a drug test. So it drive here and wait. Drive here and wait. After what seem like forever. I finally get to Tippys house to take a shower myself. It felt so good to take a hot shower. Me and my brother head back home and put Tanner down for a nap. I have now very little time to get the kids from school. We get home and start to work on Tyler project. A book report on a person he had to read. He choose John Lennon. So he I am printing pictures, glues them on and writing the summary. Don't know why the teachers sends these assignments home. Its not like they understand what to do. The parents end up doing it all anyways. Oh well it was fun and I learned a lot. Hot water heater is now fixed and we are all enjoying having hot water back. My brother is taking a class to get his GED. So I have to get him there at night from 6-9. I really proud of him for trying to better his life. Today Brad went to pick up Stephanie to help her get some stuff done. Tomorrow I have to start Tanner birthday cake. I have nothing that I need to get it done. I have to wait til Brad gets paid to buy the stuff. Me and Stephanie will be making the cake. Tanner wants a Super Mario birthday cake. Of course you can not just go order one from Walmart so we are making it from scratch. Decorating it will be the hard part. Wish me luck!!!! We are having a party for Tanner on Saturday. He has a few friends coming over to celebrate the big 4. He is so excited. He said all he wanted for his birthday was a cake and his friends. We are also about to get another snow storm dumped on us. I am about tired of the snow and cold. This winter has really been a cold one. So much snow and the temps have sucked. Well I better go. I need to clean some carpets before I pick Tay and Ty. I will post picture of my cake later and as well as Tanner birthday. Till next time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)